Some spiritual growing.

So I have struggled ever since I've been home from my mission to really get in to my scripture reading.  I've struggled to feel as passionate about reading the scriptures as I once did.   I realized that my lack of passion comes largely from my lack of purpose.  As a missionary, I was constantly seeking answers to real problems--people I was teaching wanted to know about a certain doctrine or they needed to understand a certain principle better.  I always had SO much I needed to learn--for my sake and others.  Now, I struggle to find personal questions that I am searching for in the scriptures.  I know I know how to do it, I know I probably do have my own questions but I don't know...it just hasn't come.

I've recently had an epiphany of sorts though.  I started studying the new student manual for the Doctrine and Covenants (this is another set of scripture that we Mormons believe in and it's great because it is Christ's voice directly speaking to people living in modern days) during church to prepare for Sunday School.  I have now been studying this little manual at home and all of a sudden I have purpose!  The manual has great questions about faith, Christ's atonement, listening to the Spirit, etc. and it points you to scriptures to help find the answers.  I love studying by theme most of all as opposed to just always reading chapter after chapter.  The manual takes this thematic approach and it's perfect for me.

Oh and the other key to my success: using my little notebook to jot down notes.  I have been taking notes every Sunday on lessons and talks and also while I read my scriptures. This has transformed everything and I get SO much more out of things.

It's funny, I learned these lessons on my mission and I learned them well.  I don't know what my deal was when I got home, but I'm finally "getting it" again.  And it feels good to feel the passion seek back in.

**It's also funny how appropriate this post is seeing as today marks exactly four years from the day that I entered the MTC to begin my journey as a missionary.  The journey that changed my life.  My mission president promised me when I was ending my mission that I had great spiritual experiences ahead of me and that my mission shouldn't be the spiritual high for the rest of my life.  He was right--I have had many wonderful spiritual experiences since returning home that show me that I can continue feeling the Spirit in the same way and even greater if I will still be engaged in the Lord's work.  One of these spiritual experiences since returning home was being sealed to Aaron on our wedding day in the Oakland Temple.  I have definitely felt progression even after my mission and I am working on feeling that again and again.